VI. Media

After a week of practicing and all of his childhood studying, the moment of his high school graduation was underwhelming and over quicker than he expected. As he crossed the stage, he looked out at all the people there. A heavy feeling weighed in him. Many of those out there had been people he had known since middle or elementary school. He saw them every day for most of the year, year after year. He was certain he wouldn't see most of these people ever again. Suddenly, everything before that moment seemed irrelevant. He was already eighteen, but as he crossed the stage, it finally, truly sunk in that he was an adult and he wasn't coming back here. Before leaving, he hung out with his friends around campus for a bit. They took a lot of pictures. Boldly, Eric kissed Alex on the cheek for one of them. Eric didn't care anymore and neither did Alex. They weren't going to be around these people going forward. In fall, they would all be off in some other place with new people who may or may not be important to them after those years at university. Thinking about that put Juan in a depressed mood. They were freer than ever now, but nothing bound them together anymore. He may lose contact with Eric and Alex too, with Zack, and maybe eventually with Nathan too. Could he hold on to his friends past this point in time? Would he start to forget them? Would this moment now matter to him at all in five years? The world seemed uncertain and frightening. Juan tried to push the feelings down. They went their separate ways for the night, another practice for the future. At home, Juan's extended family gathered together to celebrate another one of the younger ones finally graduating high school. His grandparents gave him a few hundred to put towards his moving expenses. When his grandfather got a moment alone with him, he gifted him another present, a box of condoms. His grandfather gave him a wink and told him not to tell his grandmother. "I never got to go to college, but I always heard stories. Make sure you live it up. You're only young once." His grandfather laughed and patted him on the back. "But don't party too much. Gotta make it to the next graduation too!" Juan laughed akwardly. He quickly hid the box away before heading back to where everyone else was. By the end of the night, Juan had passed out on the living room couch, his stomach full of sweets and alcohol. In his dream, he saw a jaguar sleeping beside him and a man he didn't know entering their house. When he woke, most of his relatives had already left. A few who had also drank too much headed out after downing some aspirin. Juan took a few himself before heading down to his room. Now that everything was over, the partying, the graduation, his high school days, his felt lost and lonely. He wouldn't be in Florida for a few months and he didn't have a job at the moment. Getting another in between then and now didn't seem worth the effort. He suddenly felt purposeless. In his mind, it was as if a part of him had died and he was there now, lingering as a ghost unable to move on. Juan opened up his school yearbooks, starting with his kindergarten one. His mom had made sure he got one for every single year he went to school. There were so many photos of people and scribbled names he didn't recognize anymore. It never dawned on him until then how many people he had already forgotten were once part of his life. Juan's eyes were drawn to a specific photo. He hadn't forgot this name and face. Steven Morales, the boy only some people could see and no one could remember. He had told many people what happened that night. It always used to be crystal clear in his mind, but as he thought on it now, the memory was foggy. He didn't feel as certain as he once did about what he saw back then. Had so much time passed since then that even something so memorable had become faded in his mind? He thought it was clear to him even a month ago. Maybe he was misremembering that too. His head hurt. Juan turned the page and moved on. He likely would never know what really happened with Steven. What he was looking into with Moone & Wolfe now wasn't likely to lead him anywhere either. Today, he told himself, would be the last day he looked into any of that. Tomorrow, he would forget about it and move on. Looking around his bedroom, he contemplated what he should take with him when he moved. He has always been interested in the strange and mysterious. Right now, it didn't seem that appealing. That guy, Roshi, might still be monitoring him right now. He had just learned that one of his friends had been seeing a psychiatrist who was a serial killer. He learned a lot about horrible abuses at hospitals and people being murdered for speaking out. All of that fun digging was terrifying now. He wanted to forget it. None of the paranormal or conspiracy things he used to love talking about were appealing to him at the moment. He wanted to go about his day like everyone else knowing nothing and thinking about nothing. Alex was likely right, he thought, about most of those things online being fake anyway. Juan knew that deep down. He wanted to believe. It made the world more exciting. What was actually out there in the world was more disturbing and threatening than those images of hoaxes he let get himself get riled up by late at night. Juan wondered if he would be thinking of Alex in a year. Maybe Alex and Eric wouldn't be together by then either, having drifted apart to other people at college. Juan traced the letters of Alex's name in the first yearbook he appeared in. "I wouldn't forget you guys, right?" Around eleven, Nathan showed up with a big wad of cash. He asked Juan if he still wanted to go through what Roshi sent them. Juan wasn't really in the mood for that anymore, but he decided to go ahead and get it over with. This was going to be the end of all that. "What should we start with? The kids show or the porn?" Juan asked. "Let's get the porn out of the way. I doubt there's anything all that interesting in those." Nathan said. Juan shrugged and turned on one of the porn videos. The movie was in black and white. It started with a young couple in a hotel. They started to have sex. As the woman was faking an orgasm, an ax came down on her. The man screamed just before his head was cut off. Then a space in the floor opened up. The bed rose up and tilted forward to drop the bodies into the hole. A robot monkey came into the room and changed the sheets. Juan paused the video, in shock. "Uh...what the fuck was that?!" "I...that was not what I was expecting. This is some...very hardcore stuff. Are all of these going to be like this?" Nathan winced. "I hope not...let me skip ahead..." As Juan skipped through the video, he sped through another violent sex scene that ended in death, and another and another. Finally, he got to a scene with D.D. and Daddy Doctor. Though the memory was strangely hazy in his mind now, the two looked how he remembered Delilah Dot and Dr. Tom Summerfield looking that night when Steven disappeared. "That's her. That's Delilah." "Huh. Yeah, the director was definitely going for some jailbait stuff. She looks young, but I don't think she's actually underage here." Nathan commented. "Yeah, this is...ugh. Let's try a different one." Juan picked another of the ten films to watch. Similar to the first one, there was a lot of death midway through sex acts, except the sex scene involving D.D. and Daddy Doctor. As Juan looked over D.D. more, he noticed she had the same haircut as Edith Summerfield, Tom Summerfield's sister. He wondered morbidly if D.D. was partly based on his sister's appearance or if it was the other way around. At the end of the second film, Nathan said, "I'm pretty positive this is a snuff film." "Are...are you sure? How can you tell it's not special effects?" Juan asked. "Look at the budget of the rest of this. Do you really think a porno blew all of its budget on realistic horror effects?" Nathan pointed out. "I don't know...This looks like this has a really...niche audience." Juan didn't want it to be true. "Not to be crude, but I know what some of these injuries look like in real life. I'm almost certain this is real." "What about the other deaths in the other one?" "I don't know...they're at angles that make it hard to tell, but I'm pretty sure they probably are." Juan shuddered. "Who would willingly sign up for a film like that?" "They may not have known. I've heard of women being led to believe they were going to be in some classy vanilla porn only to be forced into hardcore gangbang rape porn once they were on set or they wouldn't get paid. And I know some people get kidnapped and forced into this stuff. It's not really common, but the number isn't zero either. Something like this...would have to be really under the radar to fly. If word got out that a director did this, everyone would spread that info like wildfire to warn other actors." Nathan said. "Anyone participating in this who lived would have to keep quiet about this forever. Given this guy already wants to be a cult leader, the other people in these films and who helped film it may be in the cult themselves. The plot lines in these films are probbly part of their propaganda. I don't think I've heard of a cult using porn specifically for propaganda, but having propaganda around sex isn't that odd for cults either." "That is true. There was that one cult with hot sex lines to say to Jesus...that one with the kids movie about a lamb Jesus ended up fucking or something...huh, maybe this isn't that uncommon. But actually killing people though..." Juan closed the video. He didn't want to accidentally click on something and see one of those scenes again. "Even if they are in a cult...No one would go to the cops?" "If someone's doing something like that, there's a good chance they can find ways around the cops. All you'd end up accomplishing by doing that would be getting their attention on you." Nathan said. "I think Miss D.D. is the reward for cult members. She's probably their living goddess figure, or the doctor guy is. They may be a pair. I think she's supposed to be enternally young." "What makes you think they see her as a goddess?" Juan asked. "A lot of cults have people who claim to be gods or goddesses. They may not be the one actually running the cult all the time, but there usually is someone who's basically deity level to the people involved. In these films, the 'bad' people die, and then the doctor is rewarded with D.D. at the end. The way its framed suggests she's more important than him. She's the reward, she's the living deity. Her not aging may be part of the grift." Nathan explained. He brought up other details about D.D. "They really make a point to never show her tits. She never takes her clothes off, except her underwear. They hide all her curves. They make her chest look flat." "She looks flat chested to me." Juan said. "She's not. Her dress is disguising her figure." Nathan shook his head. He reopened the film and skipped to the end to find a scene with D.D. He paused the video. "Given the shape of her bust, I think she's wearing a compression sports bra too. In this shot, the sunlight from outside is showing her real figure. They want her age to be ambiguous. She's clearly an adult, but they may be trying to create the illusion that she's a little younger than she actually is. Remember those 'barely legal' films I mentioned? Aside from body type and height, they used other ways to make people look younger--clothing style, the cut of clothes, hair styles. Minor stuff like. If they're bothering to go that far to hide her tits to keep up the illusion, she's the opposite of flat chested." Juan looked at her silhoutte. D.D. was actually very curvy. He could see through the dress she was far from flat chested. She seemed to have a bigger bust than average. Nathan went on. "You can see the outline of her bra through the undershirt she's wearing. Look at the design of it. It's a sports bra. You can kind of see here how much they're hiding. Yeah...Miss Delilah Dot is a double D alright. Actually, she's probably closer to a double F. They can't undress her, because she doesn't have the figure to pass as someone younger without the clothes." "Damn...you notice everything." Juan was impressed. "Porn is about creating a lot of illusions. Shots are filmed to make dicks and tits look bigger than they are all the time. This is more of the same." Nathan added. "Doctor doesn't last too long either, since we're pointing out illusions here. They do a lot of cuts in their scenes together." "So, uh, can you tell if Delilah's faking her orgasms?" "Absolutely. The woman's not been wet in a single scene we've watched." Nathan laughed. "She looks bored out of her mind." "I don't know if I should put on another one. Do you think there will be more...uh...snuff stuff in the rest?" "We won't know without looking. Maybe just skim through the next one." Juan nodded. He clicked another film. When one of the sex scenes looked like it was going in that direction, he skipped far ahead. This time, Daddy Doctor had another doctor with him, a woman he recognized, Edith Summerfield. Much like Felicia Dogwood, she also appeared to have not aged any since the nineties. This film, Edith had a sex scene with D.D. before Tom's sex scene with her. Juan felt sick watching. Edith and Tom weren't having sex with each other, but to have sex in front of your own sibling, the very idea of it made him want to vomit. Juan turned the video off. "I don't think I can watch any more of these. I dunno...I don't think I can keep looking at any of this stuff right now." "We don't have to. Just delete it. From what that Roshi guy said, it's better if we don't look too deep into it anyway. We can't do anything about it." Nathan said. He lit up a cigarette. "Yeah." Juan sighed. He hadn't even looked at the kid's show videos. Though he knew they wouldn't include any real death in them, because they were tied into his memories of Steven, he was dreading seeing those more than another of the porn films. "Man, I finally found some real shit and I can't...can't do anything about it." "There were those lights. You could investigate those more instead." Nathan suggested. "That's true. I almost forgot about the blue lights." He would be going to Alex's house again tonight. He might see something again. Juan was starting to understand how the idea of a ghost could be comforting. At least it was something beyond the horrors of life, he thought. But what if what waited beyond was worse? What if it could cause even more pain? Juan wondered if he should leave that alone too. He was already in over his head with what living humans were getting up to. Juan sent Roshi another email from his phone after he got off the computer thanking him for what he sent and asking if he knew anything about the actors in it, hoping he would hear that the death scenes were somehow faked. Nathan mentioned having another job lined up. After they parted ways, Juan didn't want to be alone. He decided to head over to Alex's house early. He didn't want to be alone. On his walk over there, he couldn't stop thinking about how the bodies in the films went limp when the blades came down on them. Before he reached Alex's, he received another email from Roshi. Roshi confirmed his fears they were snuff films. None of the actors in the film other than D.D. and the two doctors were traceable. There seemed to be no record whatsoever of them existing. Roshi suggested either they never had any records to start with, or the company paid to have records of them removed. At the end of his email, Roshi warned him about looking any deeper. Juan was terrifed of every noise he heard on his walk. He was afraid those people had somehow found out he was looking into them and would come after him soon too. He didn't want to know about any more murders. He wanted to forget everything. And yet, a part of him couldn't resist asking for just a little more. If he had some closure on the whole thing, he could forget it. Juan asked Roshi one last question, what was the goal the cult was aiming for? Roshi responded before Juan made it to Alex's house. Juan thought over what Roshi, JC, had sent him. He knew precisely who that boy must be. Juan didn't expect his deep dive in the company would lead him right back to where he started, searching for the blue lights. 'So...it's Eric...does he know?' Juan sent another email to Roshi asking if the person who might have those powers was in danger. Roshi replied quickly. Juan sent another email back, saying he kept calling him Juan, but he never said his name was Juan and it definitely was not Juan. Roshi replied immediately. Juan immediately closed his email app. His heart rang in his ears. He saw a notification on his screen, a text message from an unknown number. It read: "Did I scare you?" Juan texted back asking why he was acting so creepy. He got a text back. The message said: "Don't worry. I'm not out to get you, but this was easy to do. They can do this too. This is your last warning, kid. Don't look any deeper or you'll end up like the others." Juan replied he wouldn't. He received a message from Roshi that all the files he had sent him before were now deleted from his computer. Juan asked him how he could know Roshi wasn't one of them. His phone rang. The phone call was coming from the same unknown number as the texts. Juan stopped dead in his tracks. Hands sweating, he answered the phone. "H-hello?" "Hello, Juan." A voice said on the other end of the line. The voice was deep and masculine. The person on the other end sounded much older than him. There was a roughness in his voice only age could give. "Hello...I don't know what to call you." "I've gone by many names, with many fake backgrounds. You could say I've lived many fake lives. It's better if you don't know my real name. But if you need one, you can call me Jay." The man said. "I can tell you I'm not with them, though they might think that I am. They can't touch me. I have protection from someone they can't even attempt to touch. But you don't have the resources I do. They will kill you if they get the chance. Stay silent." "I'll stop. I only wanted to know what happened to a friend of mine from a long time ago. They took him away." "If they got to him, he's either dead or in their cult. Even if he's alive, he's essentially dead. Let him go and forget about this." The man who called himself Jay said. "Is there really no getting out of this?" Juan asked in a quiet voice. "If he's alive and tried to leave, they'll kill him. They can't have anyone leaking their secrets. Only a few people have ever gotten out, and as to how they were able to...there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to it. Those at the top of the cult, the company, are a strange bunch. Don't try to understand them. But you should forget about this friend. You won't be able to save him, if he is still alive." Juan looked around suspiciously at every movement in the area. "I see. I guess there's nothing I can do then. But um...that boy who they let go...who might have powers, I think I know him." "Eric Thomas." Jay said. Juan's heart stopped for a moment. "How did you..." "Have you seen him do something, Juan?" "I've seen the blue lights." Juan answered. "So, that's the one he had. Interesting. I suppose it makes sense. That is, after all, the same power his older brother had." Jay said. Juan went quiet for a moment. "Eric doesn't have any siblings." Jay laughed. "Forget about it. Go on to see your friend. Forget this. Block this number." Juan couldn't move. He started to shake. "I don't want to. I'm scared." "They don't know about you right now. The higher ups anyway. But someone is watching you." Jay said. "If someone comes after you, call me again. I can arrange quite a lot with Miss Delilah. Goodbye, Juan. Go have fun with your friends." "Okay..." "Stay safe." Jay hung up. "Someone is watching me?" Juan looked around. "Did you really have to tell me that?" Juan ran as fast as he could to Alex's house. VII. Night